So everyone is on the same page about the Goal-Song change, right? Well, this far into the season, you should be. The new ‘Ole’ song just doesn’t do it for me. If you’re like me, you’ll get a kick outta this site: http://www.bringbackhey.com (link opens in new window)

I’m sure some of you may have seen these popping up at Devils games in recent weeks. It’s a great idea. Whether or not the song will actually be changed back, I have no clue - but it would be great if they brought it back, especially for the playoffs. I have a lot of sweet memories from singing that song at Devils games - and we just tacked on that nifty little ‘YOU SUCK!’ at the end of it before they axed the song altogether.

So everyone check it out and spread the word, write e-mails, stay after Devils games and talk to Lou.. whatever it takes. Playoff time is approaching, and I want my Rock and Roll Part II back!

And to think, I actually risked my life for THAT!

First off: Congratulations to David Clarkson on his 1st National Hockey League goal! :) 

Too bad that’s about all the good I can take out of today.  Apparently the Devils are holding an annual “Let’s Get Our Asses Kicked By Carolina” Day at the Meadowlands.  Anyone remember last year’s 6-1 loss?  Well they blew a chance with to sweep the defending champs and ate it big time today, falling 7-2. 

Home ice hasn’t been kind to New Jersey as of late, they entertained their fans by dropping their 5th straight home game - the longest home losing streak since November of 2000.  Kinda tests your skin as a season ticket holder

I’ll spare everyone my alcohol-induced rage rant about this game, but the Devs looked worse than me trying to make it to my car after last night’s crazy ice storm.  I don’t really think Brodeur should have started the game in the first place.  It was a home-and-home series, with a lot of travel involved, not to mention the Devils’ 3rd game in 4 nights/days.  It just didn’t seem like a wise idea to start Marty - and that was blatantly obvious about 1/2 way through the first period.

Oh hey, Claude, speaking of Marty - what the &#*$ was up with you ASKING Brodeur if he wanted to come out of the game?  YOU’RE the coach!  Frankly, you shouldn’t have tugged Marty when you did, you should have full-out tug-o-war style yanked him after the 3rd goal.  

This is not the time to be blowing home-ice advantage, boys.  Ya know that little warning in the car mirror?  “Objects in mirror are closer than they appear“?  Pretend the playoffs are in that mirror.  Because they are.  

Pardon the slight delay between posts. Don’t fret, I shall be back shortly.

It’ll be good times.

Promise.

Alright, alright.  I wouldn’t exactly call the Devils a ’super-power’ but technically tonight’s game features the fight for 1st place.  Regardless of the outcome, the Rams Sabres will still hold the top seed in the East, but if New Jersey has anything to say about it, it will be by a mere single point.

Now, personally, I would rather see the Devils finish with the second seed.  They always seem to suffer some sort of existential meltdown when it comes to holding the top spot and playing the 8th seed in the playoffs.

In other news, Rad Brad Lukowich has been cleared to play and will dress for the game tonight!  Luko suffered a mild concussion after being the victim of a top-rope flying elbow smash from Stretch Colby Armstrong.  When asked about his option to play tonight, Lukowich offered: “I’m going to Buffalo, take the pregame skate and then play in the game. I’m definitely playing. That’s the only reason I’m going up there. It’s a first-place game.”

Brad drinks the kool-aid by the bucket. 

Chris Simon has been given Time Out indefinitely by the NHL, as the league now must figure out what to do with Dumbass Simon after his lumberjack swing at Ryan Hollweg’s (baseball) head.

Better yet, Dumbass doesn’t get any pay in the meantime. Guess he’ll have to shave his own head for the time being…

So, another black eye for the NHL. Gotta love the McSorleys, Niedermayers, Domis, Bertuzzis, and now, the Simons, eh?

Granted, Ryan Hollweg is as annoying as any other punk NHL player, but, well, common sense says you just don’t do that, Mr. Simon. Guess Dumbass lacks common sense.

If there’s justice, Simon will sit in the corner for the rest of the season, and if the Islanders happen to make the playoffs, he should at least be done for a round. And if the Isles don’t make the postseason, Long Island can take a collective poop on Dumbass because thanks in large part to HIM, the team failed yet again.

…no word on any action towards Colby Armstrong, who as we remember, threw a viscious elbow at Brad Lukowich. Poor Rad Brad ended up having to stay overnight at a local Pittsburgh hospital for observation over a probable concussion. Last time I checked, throwing elbows warranted at LEAST a penalty. Apparently this is not the case in the “new” NHL…le sigh.

So, thanks to the elbow of one, Mr. Colby Armstrong (who, apparently does have quite the strong arm), Rad Brad Lukowich will be out of the Devils lineup for an indefinite amount of time with a concussion.

Better yet, one, Mr. Colby Armstrong, who was not even penalized on the blatant elbow, will likely not even see any disciplinary action from the NHL. They’ll be too busy giving Time Out to Chris Simon, I reckon.

Sure, Dumbass Simon deserves all the attention in the world right now, as he McSorley’ed his way into the league’s (in)famous Hall of Shame, but damnit, this is really not good for the Devils. Already without Colin White, who apparently injured his hand in the pregame skate, the Devils are now down two defensemen…with no wiggle room to boot.

Uh oh.

Will Matvichuk make a triumphant return finally, or do we dare see Brendan Mark Fraser back in the lineup again? Surely depends on the severity of Luk’s injury, but either way, I’m quite bummed. Gosh darnit, our boys are still struggling, even with the miraculous Patty El shootout winning goal, and the last thing this team needs is a severely depleted lineup, barely rounding third and limping into the regular season’s home base. Rochester’s Finest Brian Gionta is still day-to-day with, again, what the Devils call a “tweaked groin,” which, boys and girls, let us remember is really Devils speak for “Brian Gionta’s bottom half has mysteriously detached from his body.” That leaves us without three key players.

Again, I must say, uh oh.

Uh oh indeed.

2 Man Advantage’s Tip of the Day #4: Contrary to popular belief, Ryan Hollweg does not have a baseball for a head.

Chris Simon, I am talking to you.

Baseball head or not, you may not take a homerun derby swing at Mr. Hollweg.

Go sit in the corner.

Scott Gomez, you’re a poop head. Thanks for that lovely turnover, really, was nice. Don’t make me bust out the Poo-mez picture again. I’m not afraid to use it.

…and it’s nice to see the Penguins playing some awfully dirty hockey right now. Because, yeah, elbows are legal and all…

Better win it in OT. Seriously.

Gomez, you owe Marty an overtime-winning-goal and a wonderfully expensive steak dinner.

Crap. Shootout we go. Uh, anyone else think the Devils kinda shoulda really won this game?

Yeah, I’m actually now starting to get quite worried about our potential postseason run. Prove me wrong and at least kick the crap outta Banana Pads in the shootout, mmmkay?

EDIT: Was that…actually…a SHOOTOUT goal…for…PATRIK ELIAS?! Wow. Never thought I’d see the day. I’m actually quite shocked right now, and quite speechless as well. This is purely a miracle.

Johnny Oduya has taken his 897th Delay of Game penalty for skyrocketing another puck over the glass.  This, my friends, is a record that will stand the test of time.

That is all.