Lemaire touts success of 6-on-5 offense

NEWARK, N.J. — Jacques Lemaire’s radical new 6-on-5 approach to offense is paying dividends early and the New Jersey Devils coach says it won’t be long before other teams begin mimicking his strategy, much like the neutral zone trap in the 1990s. “I’m amazed no one thought of it earlier,” Lemaire said ahead of Monday [...]

Things you can do in 80 seconds

Leisurely walk a city block Read a page or so in a good book Make a sandwich Brew a cup of tea Sew a button on a jacket Scratch off a lottery card Shave an unimpressive playoff beard COMPLETELY DESTROY 8 MONTHS OF MOTHERF(^%$*G WORK GHAAAHGHAHG!!!! I HATE LARGE CYCLONIC WEATHER SYSTEMS

Correspondence with Gary Bettman, as inspired by the New York Rangers

Well that was a super way to spend three hours of our nights wasn’t it? Sweet Jesus was that painful. But I’m not making my triumphant return to 2ma’s gilded board for just any reason. I’d tried everything before this, but screaming at my television clearly hasn’t been working and my playoff beard has been [...]

Dearest Patricia,

While we thank you for returning Patrik Elias safely, your continued lurking has the players concerned. Zach Parise hasn’t been scoring (today doesn’t really count), Colin White fled the team in fear and Bobby Holik hasn’t been able to make a single Geico promotional appearance in more than a month. While we promise to leave [...]

Dearest Patricia,

Please respect the terms of our restraining order. We don’t want to have to get the police involved again. Also, no. Schnuggles, The New Jersey Devils P.S. Kindly return Patrik Elias at your earliest convenience. He gets cranky when he’s away from Zach and Gio too long.

Dearest Patricia,

Ummms…no. We’re afraid it was your suite/sweet joke. Yea..it was that bad. K bai. Still sucking, The New Jersey Devils

Get well Burnsie

Just wanted to say that the entire 2ma staff is hoping for the good health of former Devils bench boss Pat Burns, who unfortunately has been diagnosed with cancer for a third time. Burns, who of course led the boys in red and black to their third cup in 2003, apparently is dealing with some [...]

Ooooof

WTF?! Well I was readying an entry on the unsung heroes of the Sans-Marty Surge, but after last night’s 110 percent effort against the Atlanta Thrashers, methinks I’ll put it on hold until the boys decide to stop hitting the snooze button. Oh since Marty’s still injured, lets just pretend in this picture he lent [...]

Dainius Zubrus scored.. I feel like something is supposed to happen now. Hmm…

Can anyone remind us? Perhaps by sending said reminder to ZubbieCounter@gmail.com?!

Impromtu Zubbie Counter update!

I just had to post this, which comes courtesy of Josh at the game tonight.  Please enjoy.

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