10:09 PM ET: Oh my goodness. Scott Gomez won the game for the Devils. I’m in awe right now. Series tied 2-2.

10:06 PM ET: SERGEI MOTHERFRIGGEN BRYLIN YOU WERE WIDE-FRIGGEN-OPEN IN FRONT OF THE NET WITH NOT A SINGLE SOUL AROUND YOU AND YOU SHOT IT WIDE???? COME ON!!

10:04 PM ET: Pardon the lack of updates. I’m nervous as all hell now. Devils power play. Oh boy x2.

9:53 PM ET: Tampa Bay power play in overtime, Martin takes a delay of game penalty. Oh boy.

9:40 PM ET: Who is going to be a hero for us tonight?

9:35 PM ET: To overtime we go. I be nervous. Can we get Grant Marshall back for overtime? That would be sweet as all hell.

9:19 PM ET: Okay, I’m a bit more composed now, and I’d like to thank the Vicodin I popped for my ailing knee for my current state of relaxation. I’m still mad at Patrik Elias and Scott Gomez, though. Elias should be stripped of the C and Gomez should be sent on the next boat out to Alaska. For(e) real.

9:04 PM ET: I’m pretty sure that the EGG is spoiled.

8:43 PM ET: I give up. Too many men on a friggen power play? What a joke. This team is garbage.

8:41 PM ET: Most important point of the game right here for the boys. 2 Man Advantage for the Devils. Gotta convert.

8:35 PM ET: 3-3. Lecavalier with his four millionth goal. Marty will not be winning any MVP trophies this postseason. Granted, I wouldn’t put the blame on him for that goal, but, uh…I dunno.

8:32 PM ET: Mattie is having a GAME. See, I knew Matvichuk would be beneficial to this lineup.

8:28 PM ET: Poop. 3-2.

8:23 PM ET: Marty!

8:21 PM ET: Zach Parise for MVP. Seriously. It’s a powerplay goal, 3-1 New Jersey…F You Sam Rosen! (please don’t hate.)

8:16 PM ET: Wow. Marty got absolutely schooled by Lecavalier. Thank goodness nothing came of that wraparound play. Makes me nervous, though.

8:04 PM ET: Big second period right here. Tampa Bay needs to capitalize to have a shot and the Devils need to calm down in the defensive zone to hold the lead. Let’s hope the good guys triumph…interpret that as you will — depending on which team you’re a fan of, that is.

7:46 PM ET: One period in the books. I’ll take it. I’m going to pretend that lapse in the middle of the period didn’t happen. Keep it up boys. Keep it up.

7:45 PM ET: Hey, Patrik Elias has life! GREAT physical play from the Captain — lead by example, Mr. Elias. I really don’t mind the Tampa Bay power play that resulted, because no matter how you slice it, this Devils team NEEDS to start playing physical. I like.

7:34 PM ET: And the Devils proceed to completely fall apart. All Tampa Bay now…and as I type that…

GOAL! PARISE! 2-1 DEVILS! OH YES. FIVE GOALS IN FOUR GAMES. THERE’S YOUR STANLEY CUP GOAL-SCORING LEADER RIGHT THERE.

…whew. Travis Zajac made a beauty of a pass to Martin, who got a nice feed over to Parise for his five-millionth goal of the postseson. Tic-tac-mother f’n-toe. So, uh, bi-polar much?

7:32 PM ET: Well that lasted long…tie game. Poo-mez flubbed on that play right there. Me thinks the defense looks like garbage tonight, by the way.

7:26 PM ET: Wow…did I actually see Marty make a couple good saves? Let’s get the defense going now.

7:19 PM ET: BRIAN GIONTA! THANK YOU JEEBUS! 1-0 DEVILS! Woo. Egg-zactly what the Devils needed. Get the puck to the net and drive for the rebounds. Keep it up. Looking good so far.

7:15 PM ET: Atta boy Rafalski, way to draw the penalty. Huge power play coming up here.

7:13 PM ET: Good start for men in red and black. Devils fans have been begging for the boys to be more physical, and it looks like Mattie got the message loud and clear. This is gonna be one physical game, ladies and gents.

7:04 PM ET: Well, here we are. Game 4. If Game 3 was a must-win, this is a gotta-win. Whitey is still out, and neither Cam Janssen nor David Clarkson will make their ‘07 postseason debuts, so it looks like we gots the same lineup skating tonight. I’m not too sure I feel comfortable with THAT, but I do feel comfortable overall about the game tonight. Have a good feeling about this one. Don’t mess it up for me boys.

At least Rad Brad is in the lineup tonight. Congrats to Rad Brad on the birth of his baby! Yays! Proud Papa, make us proud too!

____

…at least we’re not the Atlanta Thrashers.

The New Jersey Devils have been shoved half-way into their playoff graves. The sad part is, the ground shouldn’t even have been broken yet. The Devils let Game 3 slip away with perhaps one of their worst playoff performances since Game 6 of the 2001 Stanley Cup Finals.

I could go on forever about what went wrong tonight, but I’ll follow suit and put it into our customary playoff breakdown: The Awesome, The Not So Awesome, and The Downright Ridiculous

THE AWESOME: Tampa’s offense. And by ‘offense’ I mean St. Louis and Lecavalier. It really should be under the ridiculous category, as in: it’s ridiculous that the Devils are losing a playoff series because of two - yes, two - players. Without either one of those two, Tampa doesn’t even have a goal to be proud of in the series. Madden and Pandolfo, and moreso Brylin, need to do a better job of shutting these two down! It’s sickening, really.

THE NOT SO AWESOME: Martin Brodeur. I know, its borderline heresy to be belittle King Devil, but c’mon, Marty. Save some Christmas presents for December, will ya?! It’s great that you openly stated that you need to be the difference for our team tonight - and I really expected you to come out and downright steal this game. Instead, Tampa pulled the carpet right out from under you. No offense, pal, but none of the 3 goals were credible tonight. The rest of the series, and more importantly the Devils playoff lives, rest in your big ol’ sweaty pads. From here on out, it’s a series of Game 7’s for you and the boys in front of you.

THE DOWNRIGHT RIDICULOUS: Officiating. Now, if you are going to roll your eyes and think I’m a neanderthal for ripping the refs, then stop reading this post right now because you are obviously not paying attention. Apparently, one of the new rules buried deep within the NHL’s rulebook is that Scalping is perfectly legal during the Stanley Cup Playoffs. Three times in three games the Devils should have had 4-minute powerplays due to errant sticks from Tampa Bay. None were called, and the Devils have suffered their 2nd straight one-goal loss. If you don’t think New Jersey would have at least tied the game had even one of those double-minors been called, I would love to see your SAT scores.

JOE’S 2 CENTS: If the Devils are going to kick out of the Stone-Cold-Stunner® slapped upon them from Tampa, they need to start with an absolute man-handling in Game 4. It might as well be a Game 4 with New Jersey trailing the series 3-0. That’s exactly the way they need to play. No questions asked. A true gut check is in store for Wednesday night, and I’m not talking about how much beer and pizza I can handle at once. The Devils are going to need to come out and take communist control of everything in Game 4 if they want to live past Friday. Yes, boys, I’m afraid that means you’ll have to shoot the puck. A lot.

Marty, this is your series to lose. Not that I don’t have confidence right now, but please forgive me if it’s a little shaken.

9:36 PM ET: Okay, game is over. Devils lose. Series is only 2-1 Lightning, but it might as well be 3-1 in my eyes. Who should we point the finger at for tonight’s loss? Ah, our wonderful MVP Marty Brodeur. I just love how he claims he needs to be the difference in the game and step it up…well, congrats Marty, you were the difference. It’s not often said, but it needs to be put on the table tonight:

YOU LET YOUR TEAM DOWN.

Step it up for Game 4, prove you’re a damn fine goalie and get the job done. I don’t have anything else to say, because the boys really didn’t look all that bad tonight. All I can do is scratch at my head and shrug my shoulders. Marty hasn’t merely looked human this series, he’s looked downright bad.

Stay tuned for our game breakdown, featuring none other than the man, the myth, the legend Joeeeeee Bechteeeeeeeel-tel-tel-tel (yes, my lame attempt at an echo.) Just give us a little time to once again compose ourselves. Hey, it’s no secret — we’re as emotional as they come when it comes to fans.

9:22 PM ET: Couple minutes left in the game. Not much hope. Matvichuk takes a penalty. It’s pretty much all over now. Marty will likely crap another goal at this point. Unless the Devils miraculously tie this game up, I’m shutting down for the night. Stay tuned for a 2MA BREAKDOWN with Joe at the conclusion of the game.

9:16 PM ET: …no words. No words.

9:08 PM ET: Thank goodness for goal posts. Marty needs all the help he can get.

9:00 PM ET: Tie game again. It’s the battle of the Crap Goaltenders.

8:55 PM ET: I’d rather have Scott Clemmensen in net. 2-1 Tampa Bay.

8:46 PM ET: The all-important 3rd period is right around ther corner, and I am scared as all hell. I hate to be that fan who bitches and moans about one-sided officiating, but this has really, truly, absoutely without-a-damn-doubt been ridiculous. When there are even opposing fans saying that penalties should have been called on their team, there’s something damn wrong.

8:36 PM ET: The Mad Dog is alive. Holmer just absolutely robbed Dowd. Holmey Moly! Save of the game right there. Marty, take notes. We might have a game on our hands after all…

8:34 PM ET: Uh, explain to me how Brian Gionta is the only player to come away with a penalty after that scrum? Makes perfect sense, really.

8:33 PM ET: Hey, the Devils have LIFE! Keep on shooting the puck. Shoot anything and everything. Hell, even let Marty shoot. Something is bound to go in.

8:31 PM ET: John Madden, I love you. Tied game.

8:23 PM ET: Really don’t have much to say at this point.

8:07 PM ET: Can someone explain to me why the Tampa Bay Lightning CONTINUE to use their sticks as weapons to whack players in the faces? That’s three sticks to the faces of Devils players in less than two games. Ridiculous. Apparently it’s going to take a Devil losing an eye for an official to even call something. Dirty and disgusting.

7:53 PM ET: Okay, after taking a couple deep breaths, I have regained my composure. Devils need to come out strong in the 2nd. They gotta stay calm, no more dumb penalties and it looks like they need to actually help Marty out because it’s apparent he’s lost the ability to stop a puck, especially from any angle whatsoever.

7:45 PM ET: Thank goodness that’s over. I’m going to pretend that period didn’t happen.

7:38 PM ET: Well. Nice to see the boys took that power play serious. It’s starting to look more and more apparant that this team will be a one-and-done. Prove me wrong.

7:35 PM ET: Wow, a high-sticking penalty is finally called on St. Louis. This guy really needs to learn how to not clip players in the face with his stick.

7:32 PM ET: Andre Roy throws nine million hits — by the process of, well, probability, he finally gets called for a penatly. Huge power play coming up here.

7:31 PM ET: So, the Lightning have managed to easily make Marty look human. Disheartening.

7:27 PM ET: You gotta be KIDDING me! Not Rad, Brad. This is exactly what you guys shouldn’t be doing. 1-0 Tampa Bay because Marty Brodeur is pure garbage. This is going to be a long night.

7:23 PM ET: Crap. Keep dem elbows down, Zachy. This is NOT the time to be taking a penalty…especially when you’re our best player. Mr. Dowd, get the job done.

7:21 PM ET: Okay, so my bud John F. over at Boltsmag informed me that it is not the arena which is so unbelievably dark, but instead a wonderfully awful broadcast.

7:13 PM ET: Wow, can we say D-I-R-T-Y Mr. Ranger? Granted, I can barely even see the play right now as it appears nearly pitch-black in this arena, but, uh, you can’t take out a player like that. No good.

7:13 PM ET: Could it look any darker in this arena? I can barely see the game! Bad broadcast or bad lighting?

7:12 PM ET: This game ever going to start? Jeepers…

6:58 PM ET: Thanks to reader and good friend Hasan, we now know that White is out of the lineup after suffering what the organization is calling a “stiff back.” Let’s hope that’s not code for “disk herniation.”

6:35 PM ET: Welp, Game 3 is almost here. Must-win for the boys tonight. Gonna be a bit tricky, though, as Colin White did not take part in the pre-game skate and will not dress for tonight’s game. Skating in his place is the seldom-used but often-loved Richard Matvichuk, who will be making his ‘07 playoff debut tonight. Let’s go Mattie!

This is a bit worrying, though. Wonder if the groin is acting up for Whitey again…

As we did with Game 1, it’s time for 2 Man Advantage’s Playoff Breakdown: The Awesome, the Not So Awesome, and the Downright Ridiculous

THE AWESOME: Johan Holmqvist.

Like I had mentioned in the last breakdown, I really thought Holmer would rebound in Game 2 and put together a sparkling performance. And, hey, guess what happened? Johan put on a mother f’n SHOW, turning aside 34 shots for his first career postseason win. He made quite a few nifty saves, easily outplaying Marty Brodeur. Good for Holmqvist, bad for New Jersey.

THE NOT SO AWESOME: The no-call on Martin St. Louis after he bushwacked Rad Brad Lukowich in the face with his stick late in the third period with the game still in reach for the Devils. Even worse, not a single official called the play dead after Lukowich was sent sprawling to the ice, throwing his stick and gloves away as he clutched at his bloodied face. At least Rad Brad returned, but who’s to say whether the non-call played a key role in the Devils’ loss?

THE DOWNRIGHT RIDICULOUS: Zach Parise’s postseason play. This kid is ridiculous. Seriously, he’s phenomenal. Not much can really be said for his teammates tonight, but Zach has continued to shine in the 2006-07 campaign. While we can’t take too much away from tonight’s loss, we can look at Parise and take a nice, fresh breath of air and realize that, well, even though we don’t have too much offensive power, we do have the Zach-Attack on our side. It’s very comforting when you’re looking at Vinny Lecavs and Brad Richards square in the eye…and St. Louis from a couple feet above.

So, the series is knotted at one, can’t say I’m shocked whatsoever — I knew this was coming. It’s all about the momentum now, and the Devils need to come back strong on Monday in Game 3’s affair to really have a good shot at this series. Sure, the postseason is still very young, but you do not want to wake a sleeping giant like the Tampa Bay Lightning. I’m not too upset about the game, I mean, the team did have its fair share of chances and did whack a couple posts to boot, but it’s always nerveracking losing any game in the postseason.

Oh, and by the way, Scott Gomez totally let me down tonight. Sheesh, the thanks I get for actually praising the poo-head. Looks like I’m going to have to go back to calling him Poomez until further notice.

And for a final note, I’d like to give a word of advice to a select few of the boys for Game 2:

____Almost time for Game 2 folks. For those who will be attending — have fun and be LOUD! We might not be able to sell out our arena, but we sure as heck can make it sound like we’re, uh, a sell out crowd. Alas, Joe and I will be at the game as usual, so if you happen to see one of us wandering the concourse, please, try not to punch us in the face. That would really ruin our day.

And now for a little something I’d like to call “2 Man Advantage’s Playoff Breakdown: The Awesome, the Not So Awesome, and the Downright Ridiculous.”

THE AWESOME: Scott “Oh hey, I actually CAN prove I’m a capable playmaker” Gomez.

That’s right. I said it. Scott mother f’n Gomez. Heavily pooed on by 2 Man Advantage for the majority of the season, Joe and I really were holding Mr. Gomez to a very high standard for the postseason. So much bark, so little bite, Gomer needed to prove that his fancy puck handling could actually translate into fancy goals and fancy assists. The result of Game 1? Three fancy assists for Scottie G, and a ton of great plays to boot. We’re legitimately surprised with Gomez’ play tonight, and that’s a great thing. Keep it up, Scott, and you just might get that $5 million after all.

…yeah, right.

THE NOT SO AWESOME: Backdoor blasphemy! Okay, maybe not blasphemy, but it did get a tid bit ridiculous how easily Lightning offense *cough*Martin St. Louis*cough* were able to just sit at the side of the net waiting patiently for, well, you know, a goal. A bit more concerning is the fact that as many times as this happened, the Devils defense never seemed to catch on, or worse yet, didn’t seem to care. Unfortunately, this leads me to….

THE DOWNRIGHT RIDICULOUS: Johnny O-friggen-duya. I know, I know, he’s a rookie and all and this was his first taste of NHL postseason glory, but come on, could the guy have possibly looked any worse than he did tonight? Johnny, your positioning was a mess and your penalties were awful. If it weren’t for a nice block he made with his stick in the third period, I would have called for the Swede’s head by now. Alas, I will give him another chance. Actually, no, I won’t. I want Richard Matvichuk in the lineup. Okay, I’m kidding, sort of, but if Johnny is playing Saturday, then Johnny needs to step it up Saturday, fo’ sho’.

Aside from all of that, I’d like to take a brief moment and mention the fact that, yes, I do feel bad for Johan Holmqvist. Poor man had some flashes of brilliance during the game (did you SEE that save he made in the first?), but, Holmy, what the HECK were you thinking by not covering the puck with Patrik Elias and Scott Gomez skating in on you late in the third period with the game still in reach? Wow. I’ll chalk it up to a rookie mistake, but you just can’t do that, buddy, not even with a goal deprived team like the New Jersey Devils as your opponent. I fully expect you to bounce back on Saturday, because, well, you really gotta step up now.

Granted, neither team exactly dominated the game, but the ultimate edge does have to go to the Devils who pounced on every opportunity imaginable and found a way to expose Holmqvist for a few weak goals. Marty was once again solid in net, but the defense needs to mightily step up in Game 2 or we’ll be seeing a tied series heading to Tampa Bay. Got it?

____ The Senators are kicking the avacados out of Pittsburgh right now! Poor Banana Pads…his defense absolutely gave up on the game, now didn’t they? Or, uh, did they not even show up? 6-2 Sens as we speak. Oh, and that shuffle you hear is the sound of dozens of hockey analysts feverishly trying to change their playoff predictions…

IN OTHER ACTION, the Sharkies are up 4-2 over the Nashville Forsbergs, while Dallas/Vancouver and Minnesota/Anaheim kick their series off at 10:00 and 10:30 PM ET. It should be good times. A point of note, if I may, Jonathan Cheechoo took a nasty knee-on-knee hit from Scott Hartnell and has not returned to the ice since. Ouch.

UPDATE:  Crosby and Gonchar gave the Senators a bit of a scare in the third period with a couple of late goals, but Ottawa holds on to take Game 1 with a 6-3 final.

Did a little searching today, found two awesome Lightning blogs that I highly recommend. Want some great coverage from the oposing viewpoints? Check out Bolts Blog and Boltsmag (both links open in new windows). Oh, and RJ, I forgive you for picking Tampa Bay to triumph over the Devils for the series. I kid, I kid.

In all honestly, we’d love to hear from any Lightning bloggers or fans — don’t be strangers ’round here. We don’t bite…I think.

So, I’m definitely looking forward for this series to begin. Joe and I will both be at the game on Thursday, cheering our little butts off. It’ll be good times, really.

Well, I hope so, at least. Damn Bolts better not thunder on my parade. It will seriously ruin my day. Only thing worse would be if I had been struck by lightning.

Those Lightning cliches don’t get old, do they? It’s like I’m brewing a whole big storm of ‘em!

I better bolt from this post now before I make an even bigger idiot of myself!

…I’m sorry.

EDIT: A little something for Mr. Bechtel. Enjoy, my friend.
NOTE: 2 MAN ADVANTAGE DOES NOT CONDONE NOR SUPPORT THE DECAPITATION OF ONE, MISTER VINCENT LECAVALIER BY ONE, MISTER MARTIN BRODEUR. SERIOUSLY.

The NHL’s Regular Season has ended, and 16 proven teams will spend these next 2 days with a ripe harvest of ice bags and Advil. 6 months & 82 games worth of action has earned these teams a well-deserved calm before the storm. Our New Jersey Devils will open up the 2007 Stanley Cup Playoffs against the Tampa Bay Lightning. The series kicks off on Thursday, April 12th @ 7:30 in New Jersey.

For a FULL schedule of the series CLICK HERE « C’mon, ya know ya want to. I made it all pretty-like!

Despite this being a #2 vs. #7 matchup, this is one of the more even playoff series planned for Round 1 in the Eastern Conference. The Devils did not fare very well against Tampa during the season, posting a 1-2-1 record, but the playoffs are a brand new page. (See: 2006 Edmonton Oilers) The Devils will no longer have to deal with the swagger of the NHL’s Salary Cap, a parasite that, in my eyes, kept the team from showcasing it’s true talent all season long.

The on-ice product for this series will be quite an exciting one, as it features superstars such as Martin St. Louis, Vinny Lecavalier and 2004 Conn Smythe Winner, Brad Richards. That tandem will have the monumental task of besting the league’s best goaltender, Martin Brodeur. Tampa’s inexperienced netminder will have to deal with the likes of Zach Parise, Jamie Langenbrunner, and Travis Zajac - a line that has given the opposition nightmares all season long. Like I said, the matchup is a lot more evenly set than most think.

The only thing left to do is stock up on beer and your favorite drive-thru combination meal for the next few months. The Yanks can wait - the NHL Playoffs are just about to start.