Hey Look!!!! We gots us a Devils game!!!!

But damn I miss the Olympics already (curling… women’s hockey, and not to mention the fun of the men’s tournament… it was all great, but hey all good things must end, and we’ll get it again in 4 years right??)… I just feel I picked up some momentum from the Olympics (I’d love to say the site did, but it’s painfully obvious at this point that I’m two-man all alone ain’t it?)… and I just wanna keep the flow going here…. but I’m not recapping tonight’s game…. tonight’s my favoritest of bar nights and all…. I ain’t giving that up, and my deal was always the home games :p…. not to mention I feel there is too much me going on here anyway as is…. so I figured I’d remind you of my “Guest Host” concept…. you write it… I post it here… just keep it about the Devils…. hell I don’t care if you write 1200 words saying what a douche I am (a certain ninja turtle fan out there will say I welcome it!)…. but I want a second voice, at least, speaking up on this damn site…. so CMONNNNN!!!!!

However that rant aside, I have almost a year of pent-up anger to shoot off at old coach prune-face in Calgary so I can see me doing some kinda write-up to shoot off on him now ruining my second favorite team as well….. but if you got something to say… holy hell… just SAY IT, I’d say email it to the 2man email…. but… umm…. I don’t think I know the username and password (again if you knew the awkwardness of being handed the keys to the site but I can’t check under the hood or even open the trunk, it’s kinda weird)
so if you want…. email through the facebook site ( http://www.facebook.com/twomanadvantage ) or just [email protected], I tend to check that enough on my cell phone…. so it’s all good…..

And oh yeah… get the hell back out there Paul Martin (and CMON LOU, we need a defenseman!!!)
Let there be NHL Hockey again!

Thoughts (again) from Sun Tavern, NJ: USA vs Canada..where are YOUR Gold Medals?

OK, so who else has simply LOVED these Olympics this year?? I know I have…. Hell I even got into the curling, and all that wacky stuff (I almost even know all the rules)….and the hockey what can I say?? The women’s tournament was a ton of fun (and I’ve made the Lady Finn goalie with the best eyes EVER into an international STAR…. now if only I could bring her and her power left hook home… hrrrmmm….go ahead, bring on the jokes about me and foreign women… I can take em!)… I’m actually kinda sad to see them go this year… but if you’re going to end an Olympics… THIS is how…. US invading Canadian soil…. one game… winner takes all…. “one shall stand…. one shall fall” (if you guys can whip out Princess Bride quotes I can go with the ONLY acceptable Transformer movie ever made!)… and in a few short hours if Kurt Angle walked up to one of these teams and said “where are YOUR gold medals??” they can turn and go “RIGHT HERE BEATCH!!!!”

And since I have some time here… and while I did like the Olympics… time to air some annoyances here…..
— I DON’T CARE ABOUT POLITICS or any crap show on MSNBC I’m only watching your shit channel because you MADE ME and no matter how many times you shove the ED show commercials down my throat I ain’t watching…
— in this trend if I see one more commercial for the goddamn census I am going to stab a kitten…. we get it… it’s important … we need fill it out… stop shoving Tina Faye in my face!!
— Though in some happy news, hockey fever is running wild in the Sun Tavern, this is gonna be a damn near football Sunday crowd 🙂
— and since I already took one shot at Michael Bay here… the only thing scary about the new Elm Street is that it’s Michael Bay’s awful dream :p

  • First Period
  • — Wow Doc looks OLD… and just when you think it… they show Al Michaels circa 1980… now THERE is a dude who looks old now :p (though as much as NBC annoys me and pushes shit down your throat… that Ice Vision thing is hella awesome!)
    — Both goalies make the first saves in the game and no Kipper flubs!!
    — No real advantage in play back and forth by either team… but some SERIOUS one-liners going back and forth at the bar!
    — Orpik SLAMS Heatley HARD AND HEAVY into the bench… no truth to the rumor that Ron Wilson offered him a US jersey and a chance to turn heel and join team AMERICA (fuck yeah!)
    — Crazy scramble in front and it’s PUFFY PAD SAVES OF DOOM BY LUONGO…and a stick save and cover… for extra drama-flavor!
    — They showed the replay of the puck on the line and I swear to God if that was curling the US would have won!!!
    — Dammit.. so much for the American burger helping :p

    (1 – 0, Can) Teows[1] (Richards) {12:50}
    Richards gets through two US defenders and works hard to get the shot through… Miller the good save, but the rebound to his left and there’s Teows and he grabs and fires the rebound up and over…. and a nation up north exhales!!!

    — Seems 18,000 people want a beer all at once since they’re yelling Miller!!!!
    — And they call Bobby Ryan for CHECKING… really… he CHECKED the dude!!
    USA kills the penalty pretty easy… they didn’t respond after the goal, but hell they didn’t pull a Finland at least!
    — Callahan a mini-break with time running out… but he’s a Ranger…. he sucks… two more periods and we can hate them again!!

  • Second Period
  • — the people behind us are getting a little bit too much into EVERY time a US player comes down the ice (and representing the US in a Scott Stevens jersey… really?? )
    — Ryan Malone to the box for FACE-CHECK!!! (Hell they might call that in the NHL too!!)
    the people oversell the Miller save like it was a gunshot…. I be happy no points for Cindy!! And I’m busy talking US beer va Canada beer with my Ottawa friend Sara!
    — WOW WHAT A SAVE BY MILLER…. oops as I was gonna say it was Richter-like… the result might be :p

    (2 -0, Can) Perry[4] (Getzlaf) {7:13}
    Getzlaf makes a centering pass… Marleau to the net…..Whitney gets a stick on it, but bad luck… good bounce…. it goes right to Perry and he turns and just FLIPS it… and Miller had NO CHANCE

    — US gets another pp but when you put Langs, Parise and Rafalski on it… YOU GET DEVILS RESULTS SUCKS… EVERYONE KILL EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!
    — Team USA is getting with it now… J.Johnson the rush.. around the d… in front… KICKED OUT LUONGO !! DAMN YOUR BLOATED LIKE WOMAN ON PMS PADS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    — Doc sets Olympic record… most times mentioning Cherry Hill, NJ … that’s gotta be some kinda first!!!
    — KEEP MENTIONING CHERRY HILL DOC!!!

    (2 – 1) Kessler[2] (Kane, Rafalski) {12:44}
    Simple play but damn it worked… Raflaski leaves for Kane… across to Kane… centers and Kessler swats at it… and Luongo doesn’t….
    see it’s off the ice… this is a good thing… FUCK YEAH!!!

    — HERE COMES PARISE…AAAAAAHHHHH!!! But Luongo comes out and gives him the logo-buster on a Rob Tonnesson level!!!
    — USA off side on the goal?? Well that call seems random in the Olympics now :p
    — Good Lord people it’s a fucking shot on goal… STOP SCREAMING… hockey idiots!! (see why I like hockey being a cult sport???)
    — Nash with the WRAPAROUND BUT THAT’S MUH-TOE MUH-TOE even a Devils fan can cheer!!!!!
    — Stretch pass and RANDOM NUMBER 21 CUTS IN BUT MILLER MAKES THE SAVE AND JOHNSON SACRIFICES HIS STICK BUT HELPS GET IT OUTTA THERE!!! END OF SECOND PERIOD… wow… we gots us a GAME peopless!!!

  • third Period
  • — Wow, that was a good play for Canada… why is she cheering this… doesn’t she…..
    I instantly cut her off and say NO…. no really the woman behind us can’t tell a hockey puck from a curling stone (thanks for the setup Tasha!)
    — Team Canada starts the 3rd period with a nice start…. if we were playing GOALPOSTS!!! HAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!!!
    — Ohhh Drury’s hurt!!! 11 minutes until RANGERS SUCK time anyway!!!
    — WHAT A SAVE BY MILLER ROLLING THE RIGHT LEG OUT ON THE REBOUDN CHANCE!! How come that NEVER works for me dammit!!!!!
    — Fuck Drury’s back…. well we only need him 9 more minutes anyway, right??
    — Malone a shot… people behind us scream like it’s Parise…. but it’s not to be!!
    — OK the save was LESS epic because it was on Thornton and Heatley… the only time Heatley hits the target is when driving kids :p
    — “I never watched a full hockey game before” (from behind us)
    me “WE NOTICED”
    — Rafalksi pounces on a loose puck… but BLOCKED BY BOYLE… if only he kept his house from burning with that passion….
    speaking of… WTF is with the random goal horn?!?!?!
    — FUCK YOU CROSBY POKE CHECK MILLER!!! All I yelled was ANYONE BUT CINDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    — Wow, the hockey geniuses want us to pull Miller with 2 minutes left… CMONNNN!!! (again this is why I love that no one loves hockey :p)
    — I wish I could tell you what happens, but the front run idiocy is killing him…. “Hey Luongo can’t catch”… ummm… asshole, he’s a butterfly goalie… ALL HE DOES IS CATCH asshat!!!!!
    — Miller to the bench… people freak out that the puck WAS NINETY FEET FROM THE EMPTY NET!! Good god!!!!
    — DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES… AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

    (2 – 2) PARISE[5] (Langenbrunner, Kane) {19:35}
    WHO GIVES A FUCK HOW IT HAPPENED.. ZACH PARISE TIES IT UP WITH 30 SECONDS LEFT!!! THAT’S ALL YOU NEED TO FUCKING KNOW BITCHES!!!! BRING ON OVERTIME!!!!!!

    — Confirmed FACT, they’re even yelling AHHHHHH, PARISE IN ARGENTINA FUCKER!!!!!

  • Overtime!!!
  • — Wow, the woman behind me called Parise the best there is the best there was and the best there ever will be… hey that shit’s Canadian dummy!!!!
    — also that kinda fitting that an Olympics I don’t want to end has an extra session!!
    — Parise comes in 1 on 3… me “so the sides are even!!!”

    (3 -2, Canada) Crosby[4] (Iginla)
    Well we all know what happened and why… dammit Miller should have had this shot too…. and Gary Bettman too busy jacking off in the NHL luxury box… and the fucking golden child does it again :p…. mb30 fakes joining in the Olympic Pile like a Jewish woman on her wedding night…. yay Canada… hate you Crosby and RANGERS SUCK AGAIN!!!!!

    — well back to the Devils grind soon and often!!!!

    Your Olympic Medal Thread and Preview!

    I’ve been a busy boy since the weekend and I’m going to be out and about for the US game today (and to be honest the only game that is really recap-worthy today would be the Russia-Canada game, but I don’t think I’ll be near a computer for it)…. so instead of writing it up… I’ll just preview it and let you guys talk about it as it happens…. I can think for sure I’ll be doing a period by period write up like I did for US/Canada Sunday… one for the Bronze…. one for the Gold (and for God’s sake people… root on my Finnish goalie as she goes for the Bronze! — tomorrow 2pm, DO IT!)….but this thread’s all about the men, cause it’s all about the NHL here… so let’s get ready for some A-List hockey!!

    3pm EST (ask NBC it’s the only time zone that matters)
    USA vs Team Swiss:
    Yes the US Team got the “weakest team in the pool”… but be CAREFUL with this team… they took Canada to the skills competition, but also in that they needed a shootout for Belarus and let Norway score 4 goals on them… but yet here they are… and I did say to be wary of this team in this spot in my preview last week… Jonas Hiller is good enough to steal any one game on any one night, but an American loss here DESTROYS any good will or momentum (or any chance of NBC showing the games… you know… on NBC, and not showing curling re-runs instead)…. and when you go 3-0, even when expectations were low coming into the Olympics, you GOTTA medal at least… and that means winning THIS game here, from what I’ve seen of both teams I do think the US is going to take this like 5-2… but I’d not be shocked to see the Swiss up 1-0 at sometime in this game and make the Americans EARN it (and damn I am rooting for them, it’s nice to have an American team that is dirtbag-free, yes I look at you Chris Chelios, Jeremy Roenick, Keith Upchuck, and Mike Modano and his $3000 a month dog food :p)… get out of work early… and be sure to tell your West Coast friends EVERY detail since the game will be on tape delay (do they still use tape for that, really?? It’s 2010, CMON!) for the lesser coast!

    7:30pm EST
    Russia vs Canada:
    The REAL Main Event of the day…..it’s Crosby vs Ovechkin version 2.0 (again), it’s the big bad Russians with their stacked forwards against an ENTIRE NATION crammed into a hockey rink, and a stacked team, that maybe had that big exhale and found it’s own hockey game last night in beating German like a bastard child (hell my line of the night last night was Canada let a beatdown on German people not seen since the BearJew from Inglorious Basterds!)… this is a tough game to judge… you have mister choke artist in Nabby for the Russians (the dude never seen a playoff series that he didn’t like to fold in)… against a man maybe playing the biggest game of his life (well until the NEXT game if they win) in Luongo ….and yes you guys know I fully endorse the humbling and benching of mb30 for him… he looked lost and average, something we’re all too used to in even best of 7 tournament-type play. I think people are selling Canada short and ignoring the psychological edge they got in feeling better from an easy win… and that this year while the Russians would love to win now… the NEXT Olympics they get home-ice, THEY get what Canada wants to do this year… and the Canadians seemed more settled with Luongo in net as opposed to being forced to adapt to mb30’s game (this too could be a small issue we’ve had in Jersey the last few years), and I really like the home team to win here and turn the pressure from going against them to being motivated having a passionate hockey NATION in their back pocket!

    10pm EST
    Finland vs team Czech:
    Boy did the Czechs look shaky last night??? (Well Canada aside all the qualifiers struggled and now they play AGAIN 24 hours later, in a way that’s good… no time to think about it)…meanwhile Finland has been quietly dominating sitting in the shadows while everyone pays attention to Canada, Russia and now the US team…. this Fin team is dangerous (unless they play Sweden, then they just roll over and die), and it’s no secret that I am a big Kipper fan (and of his wonderful female counter-part)… Jagr is still feeling the effects of Ovechkin owning his soul in the MORTAL KOMBAT body check of the season! The Czechs are good and solid… but I think it might be one game too many for Vokun here (I can say the same for Hiller above), but I also think their gas tank will be running low…and it’s gonna be tough to follow that Russia/Canada game from a watcher’s perspective….but I do like the Finn’s here

    Midnight EST
    Sweden vs team Slovak:
    Again the Slovak’s struggled mighty (maybe I pissed off Norway slamming them for being a country of ice and not being able to put a hockey player worth a Rat’s damn eh?? Probably not, the only player I ever really unnerved was Bobby Holik…. well Jason Arnott too), but they got there… and Halak’s not gonna be as shaky two nights in a row as he was last night… and the Swedes are deep, talented and rested (and they won their 3 games pretty easily)… and I am putting a big premium on this less deep teams playing that extra game and them running out of gas right here and right now… this again is one of those nights….it’s a tournament designed to favor the teams that do well in the prelims, and this game will be no exception…. Fret not East Coast, you should be in bed about 1am knowing this game’s in hand for the Swedes and with Kenny Albery and Joe Micheletti calling a Henrik the THIGH PADS OF DOOM Lundqvst, the Ranger shill may put you in a coma by the 2nd intermission :p (I had to by rule throw a Rangers shot in there!)

    ENJOY THE GAMES TODAY!! This is why the NHL takes two weeks off for this kind of hockey!!!!!