Thoughts from snowed in Roselle Park: USA vs Finland, Olympic Semi-Finals!

Hey looks like they finally got the Canadian girls off the ice (and CMON guys you know it’s hot to see a bunch of hockey girls partying and lighting stogies, screw it if a few are under-age 😉 )…but now it’s time for what everyone wanted to see….the right to fight for the right to wear Olympic gold (and make Kurt Angle jokes all summer… it’s true, oh it’s true!!), you’re all snowed in anyway, so LET’S GET OLYMPIC, eh??

  • How they got here:
  • We mostly know the US Story by now… unless you live in a ditch…. or South America (but she ain’t gonna read this anyway, it’s over 25 words)… so it’s pretty simple… Ryan Miller… timely goals and away they went! The Finns are similar but different, they play a more smothering old-school NJ Devils type of hockey, defense, defense and more defense (but yet no player EVER in Olympic hockey has more points then their own Teemu Selanne)…4 goals allowed in 4 games and 2 shutouts… yeah that’s pretty tight, and Kipper is maybe the best goalie in hockey that no one talks about…. so this should be an epic battle today!!!

  • First Period
  • (I like this way or writing a little better… it adds some flow and the jokes make a bit more sense this way… opinons??)
    — Slow start to the game but loved Ryan Miller coming out and putting a courtesy check on a Finn to clear the puck, I love when goalies do dumb things like I do!…. and just as I talk about dumb shit that I do in goal….

    (1 – 0, USA) Malone[3] (should be Kipper, and Kessel deserves one too… but no one gets one) {2:04}
    Malone chips it out and off goes Kessel to come fetch it….Kipper comes WAY out to get it and makes a TERRIBLE pass that goes right to Malone… sweeps the shot past and it’s one-zip just like that!!

    — and the next few shifts after, the Americans turn up the heat (Rafalski all over the damn place)… not a good sign for the Finns when you NEED to answer the bell after such a gaffe!!
    — and people PLEASE stop texting me that Kipper pulled a Scott… I’d have cleared the zone on the bonehead pass, thanks!!
    — the Finns look VERY nervous here… alot like the US Women did last night….
    — Man the US speed and forecheck is all over the Finns and it drew an interference call…and right off the faceoff!!

    (2 – 0) Parise[3-pp] (Statsny, Rafalski) {6:22}
    AAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Rafalski’s shot is blocked, but the Finn who gets a stick on it kicks it right to Statsny who waits and cuts the pass through three people and right on Parise’s stick… holds… flips… TOP SHELF and the Finns are in it and DEEP already!!!!

    — and the Finns now doing their best team Russia impression and US right back to the pp

    (3 – 0) E.Johnson [1-pp] (Pavelski, Malone) {8:36}
    Kipper can’t handle the dump in and punches it to the corner…Malone hustles and gets to it… pops it behind the net… Pavelski to it… throws it in front.. and in American fashion it’s KICK/WHAM/STUNNER!! 3-0 and time out Finland… and maybe bye-bye Kipper!

    — 6 shots on goal…. 3 goals… WOW
    — and keeping with the every other shot thing…

    (4 – 0) Kane[2] (none) {10:08}
    Patrick Kane is dominating the play here….Kane the shot… Brown kicks it back to him…. cuts around everyone… looks.. dump… SCWWWAAAARRRR…. and this is a beatdown!! KIPPER TAPS OUT AND RUNS FOR THE BENCH!!!

    — the only way the US could beat them down so savagely would be simply to invade them and take over :p
    — Enter the Backstrom!!!! And he actually makes a successful save without letting a goal in!!
    — Err nevermind what I said!

    (5 – 0) Kane[3] (Rafalski) {12:31}
    He just walks in, wide open… cuts wide, shoots far side… and I think they can put BOTH goalies in net and we’d still pound them!!

    — I CAN’T KEEP UP!!!!

    (6 – 0) Statsny[1] (Langenbrunner, Parise) {12:46}
    2 goals in 15 seconds… and they had to change goal songs now it’s so ABSURD!!! Parise to the corner… leaves for Langs in the faceoff dot… across to Statsny… and BAM… can … you…. dig… that… SUCKA!!!!!!!! I’m running out of catch-phrases!!!!

    — the Finns would run off the ice and go home right NOW if they could …. really…..’
    — by the way… fuck you NBC, your exclusive crap with the highlights made seeing what happened in the late games impossible and it was a damn near needle in a haystack finding your crappy scoreboard!!!! It’s been annoying me all Olympics and now I can say it!!!
    — Great line from no-longer-cousin Rob… “programming note: the role of the Finnish goalie is now being played by Vessa Toskala”… sure looks it don’t it??? I think Rafalski may shatter Selanne’s scoring record in this game alone!!
    — Shots were 13-4 in the period… and holy God that was just a brutal beatdown!!

  • Second Period
  • — I needed that whole intermission to double check all the goals… and what’s up with no goals in 10 minutes of play?? Really??
    — Rob’s now trying too hard to be funny cause this game is in trash time (though the US is putting the foot off the gas a little soon here)… “who had the worse day… Kipper or Sea World?” Least Kipper only killed himself in this one… Sea World left thousands scarred and I think Finn-Nation is used to this kinda Olympic FAIL
    — Ruttu takes a penalty and a misconduct… at this point it’s for pretending to be a hockey player, totally against the rules on team Finland when medals are on the line 😛

    NEWSFLASH… USA DOESN’T SCORE ON POWER PLAY… they’re partying in the streets in Finland I swear!!!

    — Man if this game was somewhat close I’d be raving about Kessler’s block on that play… at this point I’m just trying not to type for the sake of typing…..
    — It’s the second period and Doc is talking about preggo Dogs and pups… oh boy it’s going to be a SLOW third period…..

  • Third Period
  • — Really ain’t much to say here unless something absurd happens right? Least the US is getting some penalty kill practice here…
    — Ryan Miller pulled for Tim Thomas (who should have played one prelim game if you ask me)… I get the move… it’s classy and to protect the goalie and all…but geesh I have issues doing that with a shutout on the board……
    — uh-oh Bobby Ryan (maybe the one guy who didn’t score today) takes a puck to the noggin… that HAS to hurt… save him for Sunday… he should be alright….
    — See what I mean about the shutout ??

    (6 -1) Mettinen[1] (Lepitsto) {14:46}
    The Finns actually pretend they can play some hockey and pass the puck around…. the long shot comes from
    Jack Johnson tries to block it and it hits his knee (OW) and it kinda goes bullet-time Matrix style from going right to going left…Tim Thomas can do not a damn thing about it on that one….. but still kinda sucks to lose the “zero”… an annoyance at best at this point

    — and that’s gonna do it!!! IMPRESSIVE win for the US… not too much fun to watch once the wolves feasted on the carcass but you can bet Sunday’s gonna be one HELL of a slobberknocker!!!!

    Thoughts from Section 209: Devils vs. Starrrrrrrrrrssssssss, 1/5/2010!

    Happy new year and all that to ya! (I know I still owe a month in review… it’s half done, I swear and I’m hoping it’s done tomorrow, but you gotta write the more pressing piece first always….and not to mention I got a little bit of Dallas Cowboys fever right now… and CMON… you know you wanna see another Phily team lose, right?)….but another feel-good night and some very pleasant memories from the 1999-2000 Stanley Cup run and all the crazy stuff I’ll try to get to down below…. all in all a great night and a great win against a VERY erratic STAARRRRRSSSS team……

    the Good:
    — Patrik Elias…. welcome back to the scoresheet….all those passes that Andy over-shot you to make you skate harder and get in the right place are starting to pay off… yay!
    — Zach Parise… my God nine shots on goal!! (I’ll get more into this when I do the month in review but I love how his level of play didn’t drop when he slumped and he keeps playing the same way hat-trick or ten-game drought be damned!!)… pretty good night for our personal “one man Jonas Brothers”… many ‘ginies were tingling (and an evil Mickey Mouse was counting the cash!)
    — PL^3… yeah he hit… yeah he did his thing… but I saw some REALLY good board work and puck control and a little finesse to keep the play and the board work going (7:40 and more ice time then Rod Pelley tells ya Jacques liked what he saw too)… and this is a step in the right direction of leaving Andrew Peters in a ditch somewhere near Bayonne HS (it’s a big-ass school, plenty of hiding spots!)
    — Bryce Salvador…. I’d swear he was announced as a scratch, but 14:00 from the press-box and he looked pretty good playing from there too… smart plays… and he adds a stability to the blue line that no one else not named Andy has brought to the team this year!
    — so I hear mb30 broke the old mask and had to actually be Marty Brodeur for half the game…. I really wish he’d listen when the hockey Gods TWICE tell him something :p…. and yeah shutout #106… it wasn’t as dramatic as the last two were… it kinda felt like the Stars cashed out late in that game, but it’s still a lil bit nice to be a part of more history each time the score goes to zero (and how sick is it that like one of ever 5-some wins… is of the zero variety… that’s just sick to digest….)
    — and shame on me almost forgetting to talk about lil Nicky breaking the damn bank with all the stuff he won in the Zamboni race during the first period… good lord our #1 draft pick is well taken care of by this team…always good to see it happen to the deserving fans (and it shut up a fool in 109 who said the good stuff doesn’t happen to those in the cheap seats!)

    the Bad:
    — there was no bad last night… I’m gonna to use that space for 2000 Cup memories and my Stanley Cup Party story in that old basement apartment back that Saturday night in June of 2000 🙂

    the Funny:
    — Brian Rolston… first shift… looks like he blew a tire jumping on the ice… and kinda reminded me of the Matvichuk (I think)… getting injured and crawling to the middle of the ice to block shots back in 2000 for the Stars…. I should remember better who it was that was a classic moment in maybe the best, and most exciting Stanley Cup Final of the 4 the Devils had and possibly the most exciting one I remember in my lifetime… but as he was falling and limping to the bench I mumble… hrrmmm… I wonder if anyone reminded him that he got traded for Claude that year and it took him like 18 months and a second trade to mentally recover (and talk about pressure to be traded for Claude… and then be in the trade that brought Andreychuk and ESPN’s first love child, Ray Bourque, that’s a TALL order…)
    — so I had what I like to call my personal “moment of Cangelosi” last night (handy link of reference:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GOEO4XuQCj4 … just so you know and get what I am talking about)
    …. one of my running jokes of late is that when Tasha watches the game, her boys in Parise and Bergfors NEVER score (and even when they do she gets stuck on the escalator to not see it… and I get to yell CLOSE YOUR EYES and STOP LOOKING or GO TO THE BATHROOM, we need a goal!!!)… so on the Zajac goal I saw Bergfors swat at it… I swore he tipped it in…. so i text her and go… look you finally got to see your goal…..so when they announced it was Zajac’s goal… I kinda yelled to myself… “NINETEEN!!”… oops, well at least her Lordship wasn’t there to make fun of me for that and goddamit I am taller then our roaming gnome of parody fame!

    the 2000 Cup run memories:
    — the Devils did a GREAT job of reliving that Cup run… hell they even dug up Steve Kelley (I guess he was glad they remembered he was on the team.. he played like one game and 10 shifts in the entire playoff run)… it’s always good to see Claude in the house again too…Larry Robinson (we all remember that locker room beatdown/tirade too of course)…. Patrik Elias in game 7…. Jason Arnott in game 6…. the “six shots on goal game” (I swear I can still hear Sundin and Pat Quinn piss and moan they had more shots on goal then that)… Scott Stevens dominating Pavel Bure and then the world…. and that game 5 in the Cup Finals… the single greatest one on one goalie duel ever seen by human eyes…..It’s been 10 1/2 years it really was the right time to remember, look back, and smile at those awesome memories (and thoughts of a 110-recap season… my God I was burnt out that summer)
    — Lord Krang: lol, sherry just listed “sykora getting knocked out” as one of the memorable moments of the 2000 cup run!
    (and she’d be right….Petr Suckora only knows FAIL when he is on the ice as a Stanley Cup Finalist… the only two he’s won, he was unconscious in 2000, a healthy scratch last year…. and 3 times the loser when he played)… I love when the professionals think as I do :p
    — I still need to recall the party at my house that night…. it was Brian… a hockey princess we no longer associate with, her BF at the time and we’re all just there watching the game…. I remember my “SHUT THE FUCK UP AND STOP POUTING OVER SYKORA WE’RE PLAYING A FOR A STANLEY CUP” rant (one of the reasons I no longer associate with said person… the sick obsession over mediocre to BAD hockey players and not caring about who her friends were… gee, a theme in my life eh :p)…. so I blasted her so bad the boyfriend kinda hid and curled in the corner…. so a few hours later Jason Arnott does the deed… I had one of those old “giant soda bottles of popcorn” wrapped in tin foil and a bowl on top of it to look like a mini-Cup… and yeah we filled it with champagne… I think I drank a whole bottle by myself that night…. and a few more friends came over… I was on the phone with two more… John and Jen walk in (I know the names don’t matter, I think the only person I still talk of all these people is Brian, and that could change as of his wedding in September *whistles*)…. they walk in… I’m already fuzzy and the last thing I remember that night was going “OHHHH, WINE!!!”…. and then dragging the mini-Cup and champagne stinky body to Rex Plex the next day to skate around with our Cup and sweat champagne in goalie pads!! Feel free to add your own memories and comments too… it’s the right place for it!