Archives for January 2007

The Exorcism of Scott Gomez

Coming June '07!Thanks to a winning scratch-off lottery ticket, not only was I able to get to the game, I snagged seats 5 rows from the glass to witness one of the best live hockey games I’ve ever been to. The only downside – I had to sit in the Nassau Coliseum and endure the stench of Red Bull and urinal cakes for 3 periods and almost a full overtime. (Thanks, Rafalski)

But this is a happy update! It appears that Scott Gomez has decided to give it the ol’ college try and see what he can do to actually help the team, rather than just take years off the lives of Devils fans around the world. First, a game-tying goal to help New Jersey finally beat Atlanta, and the game-winning Overtime goal less than 24 hours later to trash the Isels for the third time in 2 weeks. I’m telling you…we write medicinal articles. The more Patricia and I pick on someone, (I comfortingly refer to it as ‘constructive critisicm’.) the better they play! (i.e.: Lukowich, Rafalski, Martin, Elias)

I, as I’m sure you readers do, remember lashing out at Claude Julien and some of his decision making. While I admit some of it is frustrating, the Devils as of late have done a terrific job of buying into his system. Over the last couple of weeks, I am beginning to notice a lot of resemblance between this years team and the 1995 Stanley Cup Championship team. I’m talking about a young, very patient, disciplined, suffocating team, that in my eyes right now, is the hottest team in the NHL – bias aside.

The Devils now hold an 8-point lead in the Atlantic Division over the New York Rangers. The nearest threat behind that – the New York Islanders – are a whopping 12 points behind the Red and Black.

It’s a mean streak that’s about to get even meaner – the Broadway Blues are in town Tuesday night, and if you don’t think the Devils have revenge on their minds you’re in for a very rude awakening. (Psst.. Hey Scott – keep up the good work, and remember – it doesn’t have to be in the Garden for you to play a decent game against the Rangers.)

Let’s Go Devils!

HELP!

The Devils have a major case of the owies.

Thank goodness Colin White is ready to go after missing eight games with a groin boo-boo. Poor White. We really did miss his amazing ability to taking dumb penalties at the absolute worst times.

It's like World War V out there...Alas, Whitey has been solid. I cannot fault him too badly, as we have bigger problems anyways in still missing Johnny Oduya (upper body injury after shooting too many pucks into the stands), Richard Matvichuk (absolutely nothing wrong, we just have no moneys so we pretend he’s still back-achin’), and now Alex Brooks with a broken foot (the bone couldn’t withstand logging three minutes of play a night). What the hell guys?

Now all we need is for Brian Rafalski to break his leg, David Hale to lose his eye, Brad Lukowich to have his foot cut off and Paul Martin to start sucking…oh wait…he already has accomplished that one.

So folks, this kinda sucks. Brendan Mark Fraser was sent back to the Baby Devils today, but now we’re giving Andy Greene a shot. Oh yes, the revolving door of Lowell defensemen has been quite fun, but can’t we just get rid of the $5-million-dollar waste that is Scott Poo-Mez and get a real defenseman to get the job done?

I know, I know. Why should I complain? The Devils have been one of the hottest teams in the National Hockey League, still managing to lose to the second worst team in the NHL nonetheless, but I’m bitter damnit. I want a solid defenseman, not some schmo who is going to play three minutes a night in order for Brad Lukowich and Brian Rafalski to rack up 900 million minutes within a period-and-a-half of play.

Argh, I say. Argh.

I still miss Richard Matvichuk

Oh yes. Yes, yes, YES.Seriously.

So we have Brendan Mark Fraser on the team now. It just gets better and better folks, I’m absolutely loving our defense right now.

I imagine it must be amazingly fun for Lou to have to scramble day in and day out to stay below the salary cap.

Damn you, salary cap.

I blame Scott Gomez.

How cool would it be to see the Encino Man clearing a puck from the zone though? Now THAT’S hockey.

Gosh darnit.

Yeah yeah, good game and all, but sorry, I am not satisfied.

The Rangers have been terrible as of late. Devils? Not so terrible. Should have gone red and black’s way, but noooooo, Marcel Hossa has to be the dream crusher once again in the shootout.

I am, to say the least, quite disappointed.

Go Cullen Racer Go!Alas, Patrik Elias finally pulled out a shootout goal. At least he did something to somewhat compensate for his magnificently brutal play in regulation. But poo, Scott Gomez proved once again his worthlessness by putting forth quite the crap-tastic attempt at a move on the all mighty Shootout King Henrik Lundqvist. Poo-mez, seriously…come on.

Oh well. The Devils are still in first place, so that’s always fun. If I may, I would like to commend Matt Cullen for his amazing impression of Speed Racer and totally pwning the somewhat lackluster Shootout Flop Martin Brodeur. Brian Gionta, take notes. Slap shots aren’t going to do crap in the shootout. It’s all in the motorwheels baby.

Alllll in the motorwheels….

1st Place, Scott Gomez, & February 27th, 2007

The three are all directly related.Fig 1-A, Choking Hazard

The Devils have been playing a lot of solid hockey lately, but that alone would not be enough to put them where they are.  It took a little help from our buddies in blue across the river. (See Fig 1-A, right.)  The Rangers recently cleaned up a 7-game-long skidmark in the teams collective underpants with a 4-1 win over the Capitals.  During that slide, the Devils earned big points and currently hold a 5 point lead over the Rangers for first place in the Division.  Boy, I love January!

 

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And he's only 3 mil on MY cap!If you haven’t noticed, Scott Gomez isn’t exactly a fan favorite around here – and for good reason.  In the salary cap era, if you are going to cry and bitch for the amount of money that Gomez did, you damn well better produce.  I’m sorry, but 5 goals half way through the season is not exactly worth $5 million. Sadly, I don’t believe Scott will be going via trade.  If at all, it would be at the trade deadline, set at the unusually early date of Feb. 27th.  (Psst..Lou: Gomez for Kopitar!!) Hey, Leave me and my NHL07 trades alone! 🙂

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ECW! ECW! ECW!

Well, that leads us into tonight’s matchup.  A Devils/Rangers game is always a good time, no matter what the circumstances!  (Hey, I still had fun 1997-2001!!)  Some may look at the standings and say it’s not a huge game, and I call those people idiots.  With the Division the way it is so far, a single point could mean the difference between making and not making the playoffs. 

 

Bottoms up – there ain’t nothing like a Tuesday night brawl in The Swamp!