Hey, news!

So sad.The Devils signed Erik Rasmussen today.

New Jersey, I apologize for having to break such terrible news.

But hey, on the bright side, he was immediately assigned to Lowell.

You know, the Baby Devils couldn’t get much worse anyway, so it may entirely be a moot point.

Massachusetts, I also apologize to you.

I guess that’s what happens when you lose to the Islanders like seven thousand times within the span of, oh, I dunno, half a season.

I still say conspiracy, by the way.