Soo… the Conference Finals are upon us.

Why the lack of enthusiasm, you ask? Maybe it has something to do with my beloved Devils completely eating it during their series with the Rangers. Or perhaps it has something to do with the increasingly lackluster contests or even my inability to handle another second of John Forslund’s untamed defamation of the English language night in and night out on VERSUS. However, amidst all the “maybe’s“, there is a certainty — the fact that I woke up this morning to find that the ‘08 Final Four consist of the four teams I despise the most in all the Ligue Nationale de Hockey. And I cried.

The thought that one of Dallas, Detroit, Pittsburgh, or Philadelphia will be parading around next month with Lord Stanley’s mug has me seriously considering dousing myself in kerosene and running naked into the next burning building I come across.

Why does this simple fact of life have me so up in arms? To be honest, I don’t know. But that’s alright, we hockey fans don’t have to backup our statements with rational thought and supporting factual research. All ya need to know is that the playoffs have been dead to me this year, and that has me very upset.

April usually brings with it a wild excitement as the NHL’s second season gets underway, but this year is missing the intensity and ferocious competition that makes the playoffs THE PLAYOFFS. It’s my theory that the wussification of the game is finally starting to take it’s toll. If that theory holds its own in the lab, then it seems to me that we’ve sacrificed exciting playoff battles and gained a skills competition used to decide the outcome of regular season games.

Jussttttt peachy.

So, um, could someone wake me up on or around July 1st? I’m sure I’ll have a mouthful of nails when it comes to Lou Lamoriello and the free agent market.

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