Dearest Patricia,

While we thank you for returning Patrik Elias safely, your continued lurking has the players concerned.

Zach Parise hasn’t been scoring (today doesn’t really count), Colin White fled the team in fear and Bobby Holik hasn’t been able to make a single Geico promotional appearance in more than a month.

While we promise to leave it all on the ice this week, we will only do so if you agree to leave your creepy mccreeperson behavior out of our facilities.

Supremely awesome,

The New Jersey Devils


  1. With this, we’ve posted four times on this very blog in one day, and Scott’s post-home-game recaps & rants have yet to show up. Fuuuuunky!